I LAHH TAYLAHH. ([info]backbeatxrhythm) wrote,
@ 2009-04-19 14:39:00
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WHOA two posts in a day!
so i stumbled on this website and as i'm reading, what's really grinding me is that there's not somewhere for fucking anti-choicers (that bitch, who does she think she is?) like me to say "HEY, i truly feel in my heart of hearts that abortion is wrong but DOUCHEBAGS, WE'RE NOT ALL SCREAMING IN YOUR FACE IN FRONT OF PLANNED PARENTHOOD, SO WHY DON'T YOU LET ME LIVE MY ANTI-CHOICE LIFE WHILE I LET YOU LIVE YOUR ANTI-LIFE LIFE?" ::eyeroll:: stop perpetuating the hostility, lady, really.

oh, also? brenda and richard brochon are my real parents. amy shannon gave birth to me. as far as she was concerned, brenda and richard brochon were my real parents, but that never stopped her from wanting to know me (or me from wanting to know her). so fuck you, lady, there's something to be said when all logic is removed from a situation and all you're moving forward with is mutual respect and love for all parties involved. (that's called FEELING. you know, HAVING EMOTION. do it. make decisions based only upon it sometimes. it's nice.) and our stupid, meaningless, oprah-like tear-filled joyous reunion changed my fucking life. my sister is my sister, my brothers are my brothers and my extended family is my extended family. and whatever, i'm going to say it - the kind of love that i feel for everyone and the kind of love they feel back for me, the kind nobody can describe but one that we've never felt before or since, that awesome feeling wouldn't exist if amy shannon had prevented me from living.

for me, choosing life was never political or religious. it was and always will be one hundred percent emotional, and no amount of not-sorry women are going to make me believe that aborting a fetus is an okay thing to do - which is also something i've said to the many women in my life who have terminated their pregnancies. i (and many like me) do not judge but do not like the idea that abortions are legally performed, so leave me with my opinion and have some respect for it. otherwise i will shit on yours like you shit on mine.

dumb, judgemental, intolerant fuckers. EVERYONE JUST COEXIST.

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[info]xnikki118x
2009-04-20 04:36 am UTC (link)
I feel like that site is for people who are pro-choice and not pro-life/anti-choice, just like so many other sites are for people who are pro-life/anti-choice and don't take pro-choice opinions into consideration. It's a slippery slope no matter what, though.

I'm pro-choice, but I'd certainly never be able to have an abortion. I started having sex at 17, and before it happened, I basically said to James "I know birth control can fail, so no matter how careful we are, there's a chance I'll get pregnant. I want you to know I'd keep the baby, whether you wanted me to or not."

I try not to judge people who do have abortions, but I know one girl who had one and I kind of judge her for it in my own heart of hearts. Basically, she wanted the baby and so did her boyfriend, but each of them thought that the other wanted an abortion, so they went ahead and had one. They found out later on when it was too late that they were both wrong. It's a really terrible and sad situation, but I feel like you shouldn't be having sex/having a relationship with someone if you can't sit with them honestly and say "listen, I'm pregnant, this is what I want to do about it."

I hate when people give either group a hard time, though. Everyone has their own reasons for what they believe. I especially like your views about your adoption, too, because I feel the same way about my dad and he adopted me. =) But like you said, we should all just coexist. Things would be so much better that way!

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[info]backbeatxrhythm
2009-04-20 03:46 pm UTC (link)
I feel like that site is for people who are pro-choice and not pro-life/anti-choice, just like so many other sites are for people who are pro-life/anti-choice and don't take pro-choice opinions into consideration. It's a slippery slope no matter what, though

oh you're right, it's totally a pro-choice website intended for spreading the ~*good news or whatever about abortion - and i agree, there is not really another outlet like that so i admire it for standing alone. i am not happy, however, that on the splash page she welcomes anyone of any opinion "as long as you are tolerant of our views" and on the VERY NEXT PAGE in the mission statement calls people who are pro-life "anti-choice." this hypocrisy is where the real root of my issue lies, and just as expected when i commented on this woman's guestbook explaining such she told me to "go be offended elsewhere" and informed me that she'd be waiting by her inbox for the pictures of miscarried babies i was undoubtedly going to send her. i replied to her in an email which i was going to post as an entry, but i'll reply in another comment with it instead because it's long and nobody else wants to read that, lol.

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[info]backbeatxrhythm
2009-04-20 03:46 pm UTC (link)
Subj: here are the picures of the miscarried fetuses you JUST KNEW i was going to send you. (sarcasm drip included.)

listen, the point of my guestbook comment was simply to say that i think your site is unbelievably interesting and could have (and i'm sure, has had) a great impact on the abortion debate, which is what i (obviously incorrectly) assumed your purpose was in creating it. i was under the misunderstanding that you - like every other webmaster on the internet - would welcome feedback and criticism from your users in order to give your powerful forum all the more impact. maybe you should be a contestant on Completely Missing The Point.

since you've already assumed my position for me, let me correct your jaded conclusion. choosing life was never political or religious for me. it was and always will be one hundred percent emotional, and no amount of not-sorry women are going to make me believe that aborting a fetus is an okay thing to do - which is also something i've said to the many women in my life who have terminated their pregnancies. i (and many like me) do not judge but do not like the idea that abortions are performed (legally OR illegally), so leave me with my opinion and have some respect for it, like you insist and demand that i do for yours. otherwise i will shit on it like you shit all over mine.

my point, dear webmaster, is that the women who have submitted stories to your site are not the only ones with passion for the topic whose voices are not heard. in order to be pro-life, you have to march around with posters of aborted fetuses and recite bible verses and throw amniotic fluid or something on any woman who walks into a clinic to terminate their pregnancy. this is not how i operate, and what's really sad is that like all the not-sorry women you're giving a voice to i am turned away from MY side of the debate because i do not believe that you're going to hell for having the procedure done. when i found your website, i was only interested in the mature dialogue that could have taken place between women in my shoes and women in yours. i'm not telling you to change the premise of the site, i'm not trying to change your opinion, i wasn't out looking for flaws, i wasn't going to pray for your corrupted soul or show you any videos. the point i was trying to make - which sadly, YOU missed entirely - was that your website could be even better were it not chock-full of the very bullshit that is ever-present in the pro-life/anti-life debate. the the misunderstood parties of both sides of the debate could come together, but such blatant and in-your-face intolerance make it impossible. no doubt you're the kind of woman who gives a big ol' "fuck you" to anyone who steps on your toes, but if you just stop to think for a minute you'd see that it just feels better to not keep perpetuating the negativity others have projected onto you (which is no doubt why you're so bitter) and make the decision to present YOUR facts in a way that is still powerful but WAY less self-righteous. i am, however, under no such misconception that you would ever do something like that. i also understand that you are running an entirely anti-life website and that my pro-life opinions are not your focus, and just so you know i wouldn't have said anything at all had you not declared in big yellow letters on the front page that you "welcome all visitors of all opinions as long as they are respectful of our views," which is clearly not the case.

and since you like to curtail the propagation of myths so much, zero of the adoptive parents i've ever met in my life - my own included - have made their children feel like they are "not really theirs." i have no idea where you would have gotten this idea, and if this actually happens somewhere (and with as much frequency as you so callously declare) i'm truly heartbroken. and the weepy reunion i shared with the woman who gave me up 21 years earlier, her entire family and my "real parents" (whatever that means? i thought everyone only had one set of parents, so why do i need to make a distinction?) was oprah-like and straight out of a hallmark card, thanks.

very truly yours,
Michelle





Edited at 2009-04-20 03:47 pm UTC

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[info]xnikki118x
2009-04-20 09:44 pm UTC (link)
Wow, her assumptions are totally ridiculous. I can't decide whether I think she's a raging bitch or whether I think that she's encountered so many crazies on all sides because of the site that she became bitchy. Either way, she most certainly needs a chill pill. =)

I love your response to her. I hope it makes her feel like a dickface.

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[info]backbeatxrhythm
2009-04-21 09:08 pm UTC (link)
her response:

The big difference between you and me, dear Michelle, is that I do not go onto websites whose beliefs are fundamentally different from mine and then complain about them not being fair or taking my opinion into consideration. Do you honestly believe that you're the first person who disagrees with abortion who's whined at me about this? I created INS because I felt that there was literally nowhere on the web that women could speak honestly about the positive aspects of abortion without even pro-choicers coming down on them (see how many so-called pro-choicers sneer about abortion being used as birth control or implying that women who get more than one are dumb sluts). It's not a politically correct site nor will it ever be. It was not meant to "open dialogue" between the sides because they will never agree. It's not a support group either. It's just ... INS. If I hadn't thought of it, someone else would have. If you're turned off by the tone, not my problem. There are a few other abortion story sites on the web, some of which are on INS' links page, that might be more to your liking.

my response:

My sincere apologies, then. I honestly misinterpreted INS' purpose. No whining, just trying to provide you with some feedback as a visitor to your website. You have made it clear that it's not useful to you, so i will tell you to have a wonderful evening and keep giving the silenced women voices. You have a great premise behind your website.

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[info]bogarteleganza
2009-04-20 10:55 am UTC (link)
Preach, girl. ♥

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[info]backbeatxrhythm
2009-04-20 03:50 pm UTC (link)
UGH i will. people are so stoop.

(Reply to this) (Parent)
i usually do not respond to things like this
(Anonymous)
2009-05-21 03:01 am UTC (link)
Let me start to say this Our OPRAH like meeting was the best feeling in the world....NEVER forget...IT!!!!because i never WILL....

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Re: i usually do not respond to things like this
[info]backbeatxrhythm
2009-06-27 11:16 pm UTC (link)
i waited as long as you did for it to happen. i couldn't forget. :)

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